yesterday, i was considering taking some time off to review the year and make some plans for 2025. then, i received an email from david spink, one of my favorite weekly newsletters, where he discussed this almost mythical "new year's resolution" and how to go about it differently this time.

i found it both very resonating and quite eye-opening. in the email, he shares a free notion documentation to follow through and start warming up for the new year. he said this exercise takes a couple of weeks, so i've already started with the first chapter: reviewing the year.

the main difference is that we tend to go for the things that are far outside of us (based on who we are currently), and then we make sure to harass ourselves constantly to go get them and judge ourselves at the end of the year on how well we match with what we set out to do.

in his version, he says that instead of trying to expand through outward goals - which usually stem from satisfying those nasty emotional wounds such as not being enough, not feeling belong, and so on. he says start with getting to know where you're at by discovering your essence, who you are as much as you can, and from there, ascend above through expansion *

in short, it's all about choosing between becoming first and then having it vs going for "having it" first, then finding out, to your surprise, who the hell you became during the process! which is a whole other topic of discussion :)

we witnessed yet another historic engineering miracle. they managed to stop a massive rocket, 70 meters tall and 9 meters in diameter, in mid-air and catch it using two arms mounted on a tower.

and while doing this, we watched the entire adventure, including the one-hour journey 200 km above the earth, in full hd. (see: here you go)thanks to the hundreds of satellites they've placed into low orbit over the years, all communication was handled via starlink.

we saw the cheers of hundreds of young engineers. that joy wasn't just about witnessing history, it was about making history.

i think it all starts with the realization that the environment you're in or can access have an intellectual level that's lower than what you need or can tolerate.

it continues with you having to put in way too much effort to be understood and to express your ideas. eventually, you come to realize that you just can't change the stupidity surrounding you, which leads you to silence and to play a role for the sake of your social connections.

as a result, this role will start to wear you down over time, causing you to gradually withdraw and become isolated, but hey, at least you'll be free from all that baggage. a good deal? sometimes it's the best deal one can get, sometimes it's just not. we need socializing, and i'm not sure how long we can keep up like that.

this happened ages ago, i'd made plans to go to the tribeca film festival with a friend i met online. we exchanged phone numbers on msn and set a date for the film.

the next day, an hour before the meeting, i called to check our status. the phone was busy. i figured he must be working. while heading towards the cinema, i called again, still busy. i tried three or four more times, always busy.

after about five or six failed attempts, i was convinced i'd been ditched. my inner monologue went into overdrive, drafting the righteous lecture i'd deliver on messenger the next day. i started with responsibility, moved on to basic respect for others, and the more i thought about it, the angrier i got. my imagined speech got harsher with each step toward the cinema.

i'm walking to the cinema, fuming, when an unknown number calls. "hey, what's up? i'm at the cinema." i was completely stunned. my entire dramatic narrative just fell apart. then i checked the number i'd been calling. turns out, the number i saved from msn was my own number. yup, i'd been angrily calling myself the whole time.

sometimes i pull such epic stupidity and then get mad about it. sorry not sorry :/

today, he won the world chess championship against liren ding, and not only that but also put his name in history as the youngest person to be titled such. wow, i just found out he became a grandmaster at the age of 13! if anyone wants to play that epic game that happened between the two, here's the link.

wondering here, am i the only one thinking chess should be in the olympics as well? my argument is simple: if the olympics celebrate pushing the limits of one's body parts, why doesn't the brain count as a body part too?

this year's nobel prize in physics is actually going to the masterminds behind chatgpt. john hopfield and geoffrey hinton are the winners for their groundbreaking work in machine learning and neural networks.

these two scientists used fundamental physics principles to develop methods that form the foundation of today's powerful machine learning. john hopfield created an associative memory that can store and recreate patterns like images in data. geoffrey hinton invented a method that can autonomously discover features in data, enabling tasks like identifying specific objects in images.

at a time when ai has become so embedded in our lives, i think it's safe to say this is a well-deserved award.

intjs are a special breed of crazy people (speaking from personal experience here!). they're paranoid, constantly calculating 10 possible outcomes from any situation, and then 12 more possibilities branching off each of those 10.

i'm pretty sure bayes himself must have been an intj. they're perfectionists, but not just any kind of perfectionist; like a borderline obsessive perfectionist. and it's not about some theoretical principle that they latch onto to make sure a job is perfect; it's about creating a framework based on their own analysis of how a task can be done in the absolute best way.

for an intj, doing a job, "any job" accurately is a matter of honor. they can't stand people who complain, whine, or act like a task is too difficult. and they have a special kind of hatred for slackers or those who slow things down. even if those people are their superiors, intjs might throw in a snide comment or at least make their displeasure known.

this, of course, can lead to them being labeled as arrogant jerks and getting into all sorts of trouble. intjs are all about initiative, they make decisions themselves and execute them without needing to ask for input or advice. and while their decisions are 99% of the time the best ones, this trait can cause serious problems with their bosses.

i don't know if this applies universally, but it seems to me that they have their fingers in every pie. they feel like they constantly need to be involved in something. intjs are system builders, but they don't really expect to run those systems, because they're introverts and not great at communication. also, they suck at delegating, so they just end up doing everything themselves.

intjs don't enjoy crowds or explaining things to people; ideally, they'd like to communicate telepathically and would probably only hang out with those they can communicate with that way. i get the feeling most of them die young, but hey, in 40 years they've already worked and produced as much as someone who's lived 80. so, yeah, they're pretty fascinating characters.

online, as we all know, people present themselves as they want to be, not necessarily as they are in real life. we behave in ways we wish we could in reality. that's why i think many people online prefer staying anonymous * because if a friend saw what we wrote, they might mock us, saying, "that's not really you. what's with all this stuff? you're faking!"

but when you fall in love with that person online, you're giving them a chance to become the person they actually want to be. it's like saying, "i fell in love with 'the person' you introduced me to, so if you can actually be that person too, then come here, darling."

some succeed, some don't, and give up. i think what matters is giving that chance to ourselves and to the other person in hopes of meeting somewhere in reality.

something i've been experimenting with for quite a while and coming up with the same conclusion. let's say i'm listening to new music to find some gems, yet as expected, i keep coming across a lot of shitty ones * and the more i keep going, the more lower-quality music, based on my taste buds, comes out.

and i just stop the discovery mode when hitting absolute rock bottom. then after i give myself some time to recover, something interesting happens as i get back to listening to one of those songs that made me think "meh" before; suddenly, after being exposed to truly horrible ones, somehow starts to sound actually good! and even i catch myself enjoying them and saving them on my playlist!

i don't think this only applies to music but to all areas of our lives. the thing is, i can't even comprehend how much shit is going through us without being noticed and falling into the acceptable box out of this extremely dangerous thing called comparison that is happening at the back of our heads non-stop, subconsciously, based on what's available to us at the given moment. and that's quite scary.

i've always found this to be quirky about myself. i don't know why *, but whenever i feel sad and down, i tend to listen to happy/energetic songs. perhaps i'm trying to subconsciously protect myself from sinking any further.

the moment i'm happy though, all those restrictions and repressed emotions seem to come back like old friends, as if it's safe to listen to them now, and they're begging to be heard usually through sad music. honestly, i love sad music; it's my favorite. i don't even know if i truly like sad music for its own sake or because i listen to it when i'm happy, which might create a strong affiliation and bias towards it.

let me share my latest favorite: (see: 'belle' by slimane). i've always found this to be quirky about myself. i don't know why *, but whenever i feel sad and down, i tend to listen to happy/energetic songs. perhaps i'm trying to subconsciously protect myself from sinking any further.

the moment i'm happy though, all those restrictions and repressed emotions seem to come back like old friends, as if it's safe to listen to them now, and they're begging to be heard usually through sad music.

honestly, i love sad music; it's my favorite. i don't even know if i truly like sad music for its own sake or because i listen to it when i'm happy, which might create a strong affiliation and bias towards it. let me share my latest favorite: (see: 'belle' by slimane).

here are some interesting tree trivia that i've found in my commonplace book recently:

- trees are the longest-living organisms on earth and never actually die of old age.
- trees can communicate with insects that attack them. some trees can fill their leaves with medicinal-like substances to protect themselves against insect attacks and other plants.
- pine trees can grow on every continent except antarctica.
- trees can lower air temperature by evaporating water from their leaves.
- if a bird's nest is attached to a tree branch, the tree can't grow upward.
- a tree's trunk grows in summer, while its roots grow during fall and winter.
- trees growing in sunny spots have thicker bark compared to those growing in shade. shade-grown trees usually have thinner bark.
- trees growing in humid areas and near large water sources have large/broad leaves. trees in dry environments with little water have small and tough leaves.
- oak trees, which can adapt to most environments, represent wisdom, strength, and loyalty.
- oak trees attract more lightning than other trees.
- oak trees don't produce acorns until they're 50 years old.
- there are about 3 trillion trees on earth. tree numbers have decreased by 46% since the neolithic period.
- pine cones have genders.
- botanically speaking, palm trees aren't actually trees - they're large woody plants.
- the locations of the world's tallest and oldest trees are kept secret to prevent tourist damage to the trees and their surroundings.
- according to botanic gardens conservation international, there are 60,065 tree species worldwide, but 300 of these are on the brink of extinction.
- trees can reduce unwanted noise by masking sound waves, particularly with their leaves and branches.
- spending time in nature around trees reduces mental fatigue and muscle tension. life is calmer in areas with more trees.
- trees help prevent air and water pollution.
- trees are just as important for wildlife as they are for humans. they provide food, shade, and habitat for many wild animals.

one of those books that opened a whole new window to my view of life. i started looking at mice, dolphins, and even the plants around me in a completely different way. i also feel the need to give a shout-out to those dusty pages with the meat-eating conversation at the restaurant at the end of the universe, and that hilarious bit about the robots going offline because of arthur's demand for the perfect tea :)

(and no, i'm not even gonna dive into the whole 42 thing). also i dedicated the limeguide footer note to this masterpiece:

"creating limeguide is our desperate attempt to make "the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy" a real thing --minus the intergalactic hitchhiking... for now."

if you're "super" tired of superheroes and movies revolving around the same themes, i've prepared a compilation of movies i've watched for you.
note: you might have already watched some of these. happy watching in advance.

1-big trouble in little china
*jack burton, a truck driver, has a close friend in chinatown who's being harassed by a gang, and this gang kidnaps his friend's girlfriend. however, what the duo doesn't know is that this gang has a 2000-year-old boss named lo pan. that's where the story starts getting weird.

2-bill & ted's excellent adventure
*first, calling all keanu reeves fans! in our movie, two buddy friends bill and ted have formed a rock band called wyld stallyns and have dreams of pursuing this path. however, these two pals have problems with their studies. they've failed history class, and if the upcoming exam goes badly, ted's father will send him to military school. this means the duo will split up. one day, a strange man named rufus comes to them and tells them they can travel through time, and the duo knows that the way to learn something is to experience it - and that's where our story begins.

3-police story
if you want to watch an action movie without filters, effects, and stuntmen, i can say this movie is exactly for you - actually, we can extend this statement to all of jackie chan's old movies. our story is about hong kong police department planning a big undercover operation called "operation pig hunt" to arrest crime lord chu tao, and our hero kevin is part of the operation. they arrest chu, but due to insufficient evidence, chu tao was released on bail at the hearing. in short, if you want to watch a complete revenge action movie, this one's for you.

4-who framed roger rabbit
*this film, which combines animation with live-action, takes place in hollywood. our main character roger rabbit is a famous actor, and his work has brought him real fame and his beautiful, sexy wife jessica rabbit (woohoo!). since roger is a jealous person, he suspects his wife is having an affair with marvin acme, so he makes a deal with a detective named eddie valiant. shortly after, marvin acme is found mysteriously dead. roger becomes the prime suspect in this murder, and events turn into a police chase.

5-howard the duck
*this movie contains many elements including space, parallel universes, and different worlds. howard lives on a planet - or perhaps in a parallel universe - where anthropomorphic ducks exist. he would go to work and come back like humans do on earth, but one day when he comes home from work and sits in his chair to relax, the chair pulls him into space through a black hole or wormhole, and he finds himself in our known world. while looking for a way to return home, he also shapes his life on earth.

6-weekend at bernie's
*now we come to one of my favorite movies; this buddy film, which features intrigue, money, murder, and comedy elements, will ensure you have a good time. let's get to our plot: larry and richard are two low-level finance employees working at an insurance company in new york city. while reviewing company reports, they discover a series of strange payments. they get praised by their boss for this, but little do they know about company ceo bernie's involvement. bernie invites these two buddies to his home to eliminate them, but meanwhile, he gets killed. when the two buddies discover bernie's dead, they panic and start pretending like he never died.

7-three amigos
*three buddies who made films called "three amigos" during the silent film era become unemployed when business goes bad. meanwhile, in a mexican village, a bandit named el guapo has been terrorizing and extorting the area. fed up with this situation, the villagers collect money among themselves to hire mercenaries. the villagers, mistaking the three gunslingers they saw in the cinema for real, write a letter with a job offer. our naive friends think the offer is for a movie and go to the village. soon our simpletons realize the truth of the matter, and the story takes a strange turn.

8-beetlejuice
*in this tim burton film, barbara and adam are newly married and madly in love with each other. one day, they lose their lives in a car accident while driving to town. they find themselves as ghosts in their house and can't leave. upon their death, their house is sold, and they don't like the new owners, so they embark on something they shouldn't do. beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice - and there he comes. well, enjoy watching, folks.

9-akira
*you could say this anime inspired many films like the matrix, inception, and many others. the year is 2019, and the film takes place in tokyo 31 years after world war iii. chaos reigns in neo-tokyo, built in place of tokyo after the war. police and security forces are struggling against this chaotic environment. a motorcycle gang led by shotaro kaneda lives as they please, ignoring law and authority. one day, gang member tetsuo has an accident and is severely injured. officials arriving at the scene take tetsuo away to conduct experiments on him. as a result of the experiments, tetsuo gains incredible telekinetic abilities. now you'll see what chaos really means.

10-8 millimeter
*the plot of this film, which contains mystery, the porn world, and brutality: talented private detective tom welles starts working with a wealthy man's wife. because the woman finds an 8mm film in her dead husband's safe that appears to depict a real girl's murder, she wants this investigated, and events draw our detective into the dirty side of the porn world. i won't say more - just watch it.

11-what dreams may come
*would you go to hell for someone? if your answer is yes, i can say this film is exactly for you. let's look at our plot: chris and his wife annie are madly in love and living happily until one day a traffic accident changes their entire lives. their beloved children lose their lives in this accident. after their children die, chris puts everything on the line to save annie from this psychological depression but fails, and annie commits suicide. however, chris doesn't give up and tries to find ways to be happy again.

12-ghost
*molly and sam are a couple in love. sam is stabbed to death by a thug, and molly is devastated. but when sam's spirit leaves his body, he gets the chance to slowly discover the afterlife and tries to reach molly again. finally, he finds himself a medium and then puts his plan into action.

13-sleepy hollow
*we're seeing another tim burton film here. in our film, ichabod crane is a different and talented police officer with his own methods. one day, he's sent to a town called sleepy hollow where bloody murder cases are taking place. all victims are killed mercilessly, with their heads separated from their bodies. the entire town thinks these murders are being committed by a ghost, and our strange police officer ichabod crane has sworn to solve these cases.

14-interview with the vampire
*you must watch this film which is packed with stars. a young journalist starts interviewing a mysterious man who claims to be a 200-year-old vampire. then he begins to tell his 200-year life story.

15-the game
*finally, if you want to say "holy cow," you need to watch this film. i won't say much about its plot and bid farewell by saying enjoy watching.

so, i had to attend this client meeting, which i normally wouldn't go to, but they wanted my input on some questions. and there was this client i'd known for ages, super good at his job, but for some weird reason we just never clicked. you know how sometimes you just don't vibe with someone for no apparent reason? that was us.

while we're talking through his questions, his phone keeps ringing. he kept apologizing and either silencing it or declining calls. then when it rang again, he said, "i need to take this one."

as soon as he started talking, it became clear to everyone at the table that it was his daughter on the line... and get this: right there at the meeting table, this guy said "i love you" three times with the most adorable smile on his face. yep, it was a short conversation, just a few seconds, but he said "i love you" three whole times.

from that moment on, i don't know if i managed to hide how impressed i was, but all my prejudices about him just vanished into thin air. on top of the respect i already had for his professional success, a whole bunch of new feelings got added to the mix.

when i left the room, i found myself thinking: when was the last time i told my own kids i loved them out loud? and i'll admit, i couldn't remember. feeling a bit ashamed, i immediately tried to call them both. neither of them picked up (probably in class). but i was determined, i'll tell them when they're out, and i'm not stopping there. from now on, i'm saying it every single day, no matter what.

"i love you" is such a magical phrase - even just hearing someone else say it to someone else makes the world feel more beautiful somehow. loving fathers, loved daughters, loving partners, loved friends, loving mothers, loved sons; what a beautiful little detail in life, amidst all the horrible things going on in the world.

if you love someone, tell them. say it often, while you can. that's what i'll be doing from now on.

whenever i listen to this epic asmr, especially around christmas time, i suddenly find myself right in the middle of hogwarts, hanging around with friends, eating a heavy amount of bangers and mash while drinking my pumpkin juice. in fact, it makes me ready to go to bed to wake up early so i can attend my first quidditch training! *